Your daughter at 14
Hormonal
levels, emotional issues, social pressures - at this age, your daughter goes
through many changes, some of which are easy to notice, and some are not.
Her body
Puberty
in girls begins between the ages of 8 and 13 and ends around 14 or 15 years of
age. First, the chest begins to grow, then the hair under the arms and in the
pubic area begins to grow. She probably got her first period about 2 years
after her breasts started growing, but every girl is different. It is normal
for her to start a little earlier or a little later than other girls her age.
Many
other physical changes also take place. She has probably already had a growth
spurt, is taller, has widened hips and thighs, and may have acne.
Her feelings and her friends
Girls
this age struggle to figure out who they are and how they fit in. Your daughter
may question and challenge the rules at home and school. As she seeks more
freedom, she begins to move away from you. This is normal because she is
learning to be more independent.
Girls
can be both excited about this new phase in their lives and confused about how
their bodies are changing. Young girls are usually worried about their
appearance and are more concerned about their appearance and clothing.
Due to
this concern, which is often amplified by the media, girls of this age may try
dieting. Now is not the best time to cut down on food intake as they are still
growing. Eating disorders sometimes appear in early adolescence.
At 14,
your daughter interacts more with her peers. The acceptance of her friends is
very important and she compares herself to them. She may feel pressured to try
drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, or have sex. Most teenagers text their friends and
are active on social media like Facebook and Tumblr. They may be spending more
time on social media than you think, and possibly late at night when you don't
know it.
You've
probably heard that teenagers can be moody and your 14 year old is no exception.
She is self-centered, oscillating between certainty and doubt. She may be
embarrassed because she feels like she's the center of attention. Hormonal
changes, self-esteem struggles, acceptance by friends, and growing distance
from you can all play a role.
School
is central to your 14-year-old daughter's life, and at her age she takes on
more responsibilities and more stress. She needs to come to class, do her
homework and do extracurricular activities, dealing with friends, high
expectations and lots of distractions.
Her growing brain
Children
progress at different rates, but she will develop the ability to think
abstractly and may have a stronger sense of right and wrong. She is able to
think ahead and set goals.
Sometimes
attention or learning problems arise now because of the more difficult demands
of schoolwork in high school.
Her
brain is still growing, and brain changes during adolescence may explain why
psychiatric disorders may appear. Check in with your daughter frequently to see
how she is feeling. Make sure what looks like teenage mood swings isn't
something more serious than depression. If you have any concerns about her
mental health, talk to her doctor right away.
Her safety and health
Even
though your daughter wants to be independent, she still needs your support and
guidance, especially when it comes to safety and health.
- Talk to her about the dangers of drugs, alcohol, tobacco and sexual activity. Model healthy behavior.
- Always know where your teenager is when she gets home and who he is with. Reassure her that leaving early is always possible; if she is uncomfortable or does not like the group activity, you can call or send a message.
- Serve healthy food and eat with the whole family as much as possible.
- Make sure your 14 year old visits their doctor every year and the dentist twice a year.
- Help her find healthy ways to deal with stress. Share with her how you do it.
- Limit screen time to 2 hours a day (excluding time spent on homework) and keep an eye on what your daughter is watching and reading.
- Encourage her to be active for an hour each day.
- Encourage her to get enough sleep; most teenagers don't. Lack of sleep makes it difficult to concentrate at school and can exacerbate mood swings.
More you can do
Conflict
with a teenager is natural. Choose your battles. Select important issues such
as safety and school to focus on. Don't worry too much about clothes and hair.
Other
things you should pay attention to:
- Get to know your daughter's friends and the parents of her friends.
- Take part in their school. You will get to know her teachers and learn more about her performances and behavior.
- If you think she may have attention or learning problems, evaluate her as soon as possible.
- Help her boost her self-esteem by celebrating her efforts, even if things don't go the way she hoped. Praise her actions, not just her appearance.
- In case of conflict, listen to her side and answer all her questions. Ask for feedback and follow some of her suggestions, if any.
- She may feel overwhelmed by her studies and social activities. Reassure her that setting boundaries is okay.
- Ask her opinion about family decisions and let her make more of her own decisions.
- She's old enough to take care of household chores - vacuuming, cleaning, gardening, cooking her own dinner - and participation will help her feel valued and competent.
- Encourage her to take on new challenges, like playing sports, no matter what her friends are doing, and even if she thinks she won't make the team.
- Offer to volunteer for a cause she believes in. She will feel valued and her self-esteem will increase.
- Spend time together. Do what you both enjoy. A good conversation can happen naturally.